She Should Have Said No (aka Wild Weed)

1949

70 Minutes

Director: Sam Newfield

Writer: Richard Landau, Arthur Hoerl

Four things about this film: It is introduced by the one and only Kroger Babb, it was Jack Elam’s film debut, it co-stars Lyle Talbot and, has a fascinating back story involving the female lead Lila Leeds and her unfortunate run in with the law, marijuana and Robert Mitchum just a year prior to the films production.

SSHSN is common to the morality movies that were churned out in the 30’s and 40’s by production companies such as Roadshow Attractions, Hallmark Productions and many more like them. Movies like Reefer Madness, The Pace That Kills, and Marihuana Assassin of Youth were amazing frenetic concoctions that used cautionary tales combined with wildly exaggerated melodrama to lure both those in the know and those ignorant of drug culture into the movie house. SSHSN focuses  on marijuana’s hyperkinetic effects and association with violence, immorality and insanity. You might say “what a terrible thing to do.” Maybe so, but it was a money maker and could be done on the cheap with a guaranteed audience. The legendary Kroger Babb – producer, distributor, showman - knew this better than anyone. Concerning this movie we have the following from Wikipedia:

With other films, Babb would try different approaches. For She Shoulda Said No!, an anti-marijuana film of the 1950s, he highlighted the sexual scenes and arranged "one-time-only" midnight showings, claiming that his company was working with the United States Treasury Department to release the film "in as many towns and cities as possible in the shortest possible length of time" as a public service. David F. Friedman, another successful exploitation filmmaker of the era, has attributed the "one-time-only" distribution to a quality so low that Babb wanted to cash in and move to his next stop as fast as possible. At each showing of a film, a singing of "The Star Spangled Banner" was also required.

And of course this film has no sex scenes. However, that was not Mr. Babb’s primary concern; ticket sales were. An excellent account of his amazing antics can be found in exploitation filmmaker Dave Friedman’s autobiography A Youth in Babylon: Confessions of a Trash-Film King. Read it you fool!!

It is also Jack Elam’s film debut and co-stars the always steady Lyle Talbot. But the most interesting story concerns Lila Leeds who plays the female lead and her history with Robert Mitchum. Ms. Leeds and “Bob” were arrested just a year before this movie was made when she, another couple and swaggering Bob were busted at a pot party at the house she was renting in Laurel Canyon.

She's The One With The Weed!

 They both ended up doing 60 days in county. Mitchum – who often bragged  about walking around LA with a joint tucked behind his ear - claimed the whole thing was a set up. When he and Lyla arrived at the LA police station immediately following their arrest there were already a number of press agencies and photographers present. The LAPD had been criticized in the press for their lax effort against the perceived drug problem and Mitchum said they were just making an example of him to improve public relations. Mitchum’s career suffered none. Sadly poor Lyla became hooked on heroine while in jail and, as far as I can tell, had a rough time of it after getting out with a couple of kids and two broken marriages. In her mid 60s she turned to our Lord Bejesus Christ for comfort. She died at the age of 71. Shit, I knew jail was the best place for pot smokers. 

Irony

So, according to the timeline, Lyla was probably addicted to or in recovery from heroin when this thing was being shot. The movie was to capitalize on her and Bob’s arrest and it surely did. As for the movie she and the supporting cast do a pretty decent job. Lyla, who plays Anne Lester the obligatory young innocent, is corrupted by one slick talking dealer “Markey” played by Alan Baxter with a nasty nasal reminiscent of Jack Nicholson (who was about 12 years old at the time.) Jack Elam, credited as Henchman Raymond, doesn’t have a lot to say but plays it well and with both eyes pointing the same direction. Overall this movie has very good production values, above average acting and, as mentioned, includes the inimitable Lyle Talbot (Captain Hayes) with that wonderful somber, resonant voice.  What can I say? I love listening to the man’s voice whatever he is talking about: high school punks, transvestites, UFOs or pot-heads. There is also a scared straight segment where Lyla is being leaned on for info that is done dead-on and has true dramatic impact. So I say watch the movie, enjoy Lyle’s voice and the attractive Ms. Leeds, and wonder just what that pot party was like long ago on a balmy LA night in August of 1948. Four Tightly Rolled Merkins.

Psycho Shark (aka Jaws in Japan)

2009

70 Minutes

Director: John Hijiri

Writer: Yasutoshi Murakaw

After watching too many first rate Asian Extreme movies (Miike, Gaira, Ikeda, etc) it’s nice to find Japanese cinema producing thin noodled cable fare for US distribution. Oh, Amazon prime, that $99 has brought me so much ramen in so little time. To be kind perhaps Psycho Shark is a meditative piece on the predatory nature of man. The filmmakers had something in mind. People just don’t go out and point a camera and say go...do they? 

Supposedly filmed in Okinawa, where the water is oh so blue, there is a lot of splashing, not nude shower scenes, and some very nice Japanese bikinis on display not to mention the ample flesh that fills them.

 There are dreams of sharks and there is a symbolic Shark that appears at the end of the movie. There is murder but not much mayhem. I enjoyed this movie. Man as shark. I will watch it again when properly medicated to ensure maximum absorption. Two Ample Asian Merkins. 

Beasterday: Here Comes Peter Cottonhell – Available on Amazon Prime

2014

87 Minutes

Director: The Snygg Brothers

Writers: The Snygg Brothers

I have great affection for B movies not shot in southern California or New York City. Regional they’re called and the smaller the town the more interested I am in watching. So it goes with Beasterday from Allentown Pennsylvania. The directors, Spencer and Zachary Snygg, were close enough to Baltimore to get a strong whiff of John Water’s fetishistic whimsy when they were growing up. And fetishistic whimsy, when deployed well, is a wonderful ingredient in Z grade genre films. These films are often intolerable to normal people owing to a certain lack of pacing and sub-par acting. Fair enough. But here’s the thing, if you have  obsessed characters that hoot and howl with a fetishistic twist you have a hook to win over genre obsessed movie fans like myself. There is no exposition in this flick,  just a giant horribly animated stop-motion bunny – Peter Cottenhell - that starts ravaging the residents of Allentown on Easter.
The Roger Corman nudity rule is in play: If you show women’s breasts do it early and often and then get on with the story. Our protagonists are a guy and gal who work for “Dog Catchers in the Rye” animal control company (they have adorable uniforms; would love to own one - have to track down the Snygg Brothers.) The young lady wants to move back in with her dad and step-mom after failing as a dancer to become a poet. Her father is having none of it and insists she get a real job. The young man is obsessed with being the world’s best dog catcher and really enjoys shoving objects – stuffed bunnies, socks, pencils – down his pants. The young ladies father is on a restrictive diet and has a really interesting pork fetish complete with baby clothes and bacon on a string. Neither the young man nor the father are the least bit embarrassed about their behavior which is what makes this so fun. I won’t give away the ending but it involves a lobotomy and a man dressed as a giant carrot. Hey Snygg brothers.....keep making movies! The movie stars Peter Sullivan, Marisol Custodio, John Fedele, Jon Arthur, and Bill Joachim and features cameos by scream queens Darian Caime, AJ Khan, Kerri Taylor, Jackie Stevens, Autumn Bodell, and Violetta Storms. Three Carrot Orange Merkins.

The Man Without a Body - Available on YouTube 1957 

Filmplays Limited 

Director: Billy Wilder

Distributed by Budd Rogers Releasing Corporation Filmed in the UK on a budget of 20,000 pounds and directed by W. Lee Wilder younger brother of Billy Wilder whom lovingly referred to “Willie” as “a dull son of a bitch.” The plot concerns a wealthy SOB with a brain tumor played by George Coulouris (Citizen Kane, Papillon) who convinces a monkey-head-transplant doctor played by Robert Hutton (The Green Slime) to attempt a human head transplant. Somewhat interesting is the donor head is that of Nostradamus. Don’t ask it doesn’t matter! 

                                                         I Predict This Movie Will Suck 

 The twist comes when the SOB finds out his gold digging girlfriend is screwing the lab assistant. He shoots the lab assistant and Nostradamus’s head ends up on the first man dying - simple head triage. The final scene of the lab assistant walking around London with a fake Nostradamus head in a giant white box on his shoulders being pursued by a panicked SOB with a brain tumor is worth a few minutes. Also, Robert Hutton can really smoke a cigarette. Check it out. Two ½ foretold Merkins.

It Follows (2014)

100 Minutes

Director: David Mitchell

Writer: David Mitchell

David Lynch, David Cronenberg and David Robert Mitchell. Well, not quite. While It Follows at times envelops you in the wet and rotting Detroit environs, and while there are a few uncomfortable scenes that may make you squirm, it is at heart a teen slasher.The original element being the sex act, instead of luring the monster as in all those 80s franchises,is now a chore that must be accomplished to divert it. The origin of the monster-zombie apparition thing is never really explained other than to say some young guy got it from a one night stand with a gal who made a hasty departure. Once cursed (fucked) you must spend your life pursued by this implacable apparition, that is, until you have sex and pass the curse on to the next victim. Although, having done so like herpes, the curse hangs around and may flare up during times of stress. The apparition can only be seen by the fucked one and the fucked one’s predecessors; you know, the kids who brought herpes to your high school in the first place. The apparition can only walk; no skipping and no heel-to-toe shit. It can take any human form – a mother and father make an appearance - and appear at any time like when you are staring off into space, trying to sleep or just trying to get away from that thing that keeps appearing and walking at you. Like a dream you say? More like an angry friend who thinks you were the one who ran over their cat. And get away the teens do by foot, by bike and by car. So what is all this shit? Is it a metaphor for Detroit’s fall from great city to ghost town? Maybe.  Is it a reflection of the general economic decline of the middle class which is, after all, being fucked as the super rich laugh?  Could be. Is it the Devil? Had the teens arranged a hasty Baptist wedding before fucking would the apparition have grown wings and flown away? Don’t know. The hero/final girl wanna be Jay (wonderfully played by 21 year old Maika Monroe) has several scenes of being immersed in water.

Wash My Sins Away

Does this represent her desire to return to a state of innocence? It is made clear early on that she is not a virgin. And after the initial deception of receiving the curse from the “young guy” in an abandoned parking lot she has sex with every guy in the movie out of scared shitless self-preservation.  There is no time for contemplating innocence; only for keeping your head above water. I’m thinking they should have had a dog. Dogs can sense things and have very sharp teeth. And with a dog alongside they would have resembled a pot-smoking version of that 1970s animated series concerned with ghosts, snacks and such. Aside from the narrative aspect, with all its fucking and running, the movie has some nice touches for us older folks. The production design consists of old homes, old American cars built in Detroit, and old schlocky sci/fi horror films viewed on old not so flat-screen TVs. Thank you Killers from Outer Space, Godzilla and The Vulture. Oh, and then the movie ends. Three wet and soggy Merkins. Check it out.